Reading Gone Wrong

I've always thought I wanted to live in a Gothic novel...mostly because I've already enjoyed several fainting spells in my life, and I figure, I might as well be doing it in a setting where it's socially acceptable. Plus, I love pathetic fallacy.

However, I have recently changed my mind, because fainting is, in fact, highly over-rated.

I am about to briefly recount the most embarrassing moment of my life thus far...

Friday afternoon, I was reading "Interview with the Vampire" during my lunch break. During a particularly bloody scene, I started to feel woozy. This didn't really surprise me at all, and I put the book down. Instead of lying down on the couch I was sitting on, I decided to go buy a drink at the coffee shop next to where I was reading (to get my blood sugar up...although I'd just eaten, so this really wasn't the issue). I successfully ordered a drink, but instead of listening to my body and sitting back down immediately, I stood and waited for my order. As soon as it was in my hand, I headed for a chair...

...and woke up flat on my face.

I can laugh about it now, but this whole situation is completely humiliating on a lot of levels. First, a book made me faint. I just feel like that's a really uncool way to go. Most other times I've fainted were medically related, or I at least had a visual. This was all in my head.

Second, of all the places to faint, the crowded coffee shop I go to almost every day was one of the worst, because I'm a regular...and now I'm the regular who fainted.

Third, this is not my first time fainting, and normally I can keep it from happening because I know the signs. However, in the moments preceding my most recent episode, I decided to risk standing up because I didn't want to look silly and sit down on the floor. I guess I thought falling on my face in the middle of the shop would be less embarrassing. One bloody chin and several bruises later, I have decided I was wrong.

I am not a clumsy person. I just seem to do these kinds of things to myself every few months. Maybe I do belong in a Gothic novel...but I most certainly don't want to be in one any more.